Trusting God

 

Week of December 2

 

It had been 16 years since I visited any gynecologist.  I had no problems up until last year.  I had been having irregular bleeding and heavy periods.  I had several tests.... and they found that I had fibroids and a cyst on my ovary.  My doctor suggested in November a full hysterectomy. 

 

This would be my 5th surgery where they would be cutting my abdomen so I would have to sign a paper that I understand that there is more risk involved. I asked about keeping my ovaries so that I wouldn’t go into full menopause. My doctor said given my age and the cyst (that may require surgery to be removed in the future) she recommended taking everything.  So she told me to let her know what I wanted to do. 

 

 I struggled with this until the day before she had scheduled my surgery, January 30.  I had asked the Lord over and over again if I am doing the right thing.  To be honest with you I was afraid.  It was a pride issue also.  I didn’t want anyone to know, because it could look as though I was weak or defeated.   I chose not to tell anyone but my family. 

 

I had these thoughts that were not of God that were telling me that things would not go right and I would die on the operating table. I was upset and I

 

was up late at night worrying.  I picked up the Bible looking for an answer. I went to several church services seeking solace but the negative thoughts just continued worse than ever.  It was like the more positive I received the more negative I became. This whole thing was overwhelming.  Pastor always says that the battle is in the mind. Let me tell you what was going on in my head was a war. 

 

I had decided that I would go to women's group and afterwards I would call the doctor to tell her I decided to delay the surgery.  But when I went to women's group Sandy who has always been such a comfort to me and my family, praying for us etc., came up to me and told me she was happy to see me there and asked me if I would be now able to come on Tuesdays.  I told her what was going on and she began to talk and I knew the Lord was speaking to me through her because a peace and comfort came on me.  The attacks immediately stopped.  Sharon prayed for me and I was relaxed and knew what I had to do and it was right. I would have the operation. 

 

Everything went extremely well in surgery and I was up walking in 8 hours,  I went home two days later.  When I was in the hospital I had such comfort knowing that Jesus was there with me.  The nursing staff commented on how fast I was up and walking and I knew that it was the Lord giving me the ability to get around so quickly. 

 

When I returned  a week later to have the staples removed my doctor shared what she didn’t want to tell me on the telephone.  She said they tested everything that was taken out and found that I

had cancerous cells in the body of my uterus. This is an extremely fast growing cancer. Every time the uterus sheds, the cancer grows and starts spreading into the blood. The recommended procedure for  this is a full hysterectomy. What they found was that the cancerous cells were still intact and were concentrated in one area of the uterus 

 

My doctor told me that I was a lucky woman that someone was watching over me.  I said I know God is.  She said you are cured.  She kept saying that over and over.  We cried and held one another. 

 

My doctor had no idea that the cancer cells were there.  I asked her why it wasn't seen on all the tests.  She said that where it was located no test would have detected it.  I cried even more.  If I had not had this operation I would be looking at 5-6 months, that’s all.

 

If my doctor had not taken my ovaries she would have had to go back in and get them.  When cancer is present the best operation is actually cutting your abdomen (what I had) because when they do the other surgery there is a risk of dropping cells. 

 

What an awesome God we have.  Not only did He heal me of something that would have killed me but also He didn't even let me know that I had it and my family never had to go through that worry and anguish.  I do not have to know everything.  I just have to trust Him.  No glory can be given to any test or doctor but only to God. He knew. No one else did.  I am so grateful words can’t describe.

 

Jackie Harmon

Richmond ,Virginia